The play-off

FIRST ROUND:

Too much emotional turmoil and not enough offense in Cincy…

Jets 24, Bengals 13

They can’t do it to ‘em two weeks in a row and McNabb proves why he’s one of the top 10 QBs ever to play the game. Romo unfairly blamed. Bum Phillips

Eagles 31, Cowboys 21

People don’t realize just how important Welker is to the offense. Ravens ride “no one believed in us”, Ray Rice, and McGahee to the upset.

Ravens 26, Patriots 17

The Packers realize the difference in playing against Kurt Warner, as opposed to Matt Leinart. Woodson’s injury is the sneaky subplot of this one…

Cardinals 34, Packers 23

DIVISIONAL ROUND

Indy rights the ship after two straight losses and dooms MD to another season of turmoil as their most hated nemesis ends their season once again.

Indianapolis 23, Ravens 13

Mark Sanchez can’t make the homecoming into a joyous occasion. Norv Turner finally doesn’t blow it.

Chargers 37, Jets 17

History repeats itself as the Saints dominate the Eagles in the dome in the real NFC Championship game.

Saints 45, Eagles 31

Favre is finished and will retire again with the ignoble distinction of falling apart at the end of the season. Press explains away yet another post-season collapse.

Cardinals 30, Vikings 19

CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIPS

Norv Turner blows it.

Indianapolis 37, Chargers 34

The Saints are too talented for the Cardinals who are the beneficiaries of luck and timing.

Saints 48, Cardinals 37

SUPER BOWL

Peyton wins another MVP. The entire state of MD contents themselves with the fact that Manning is a nice guy and another Super Bowl parade raises the chances that Irsay will be seriously injured in a confetti accident.

Indianapolis 27, Saints 23

Bowling over the Play-offs

Play-offs?!?  Who needs the play-offs?!?  Certainly not Division 1 football or the Kansas City Chiefs (or Joe Flacco, sadly). 

What better way to reward a season-long of bitter in-fighting than with a series of meaningless games geared toward economic stimulation of numerous cities across the country (the #1 reason to keep the current system)?  I’m excited and can’t wait (which I’m sure is not the feeling in Boise, Ft. Worth, and Cincinatti… But those are the breaks.  All the proposed plans for the four-team play-offs would’ve left one or two of you out, anyway.)

Without further ado, here’s my guide to the bowl season:

New Mexico – December 19^th

            Wyoming v. Fresno State

The last time Wyoming played in a bowl game, Michael Jordan was dominating the NBA, milk and a galloon of gas cost a little over a dollar, and Barack Obama was a barely visible community organizer on the south side of Chicago.  Needless to say it’s been awhile.  Expect the Cowboys to be distracted by the vibrant, Albuquerque nightlife (don’t laugh… ‘querque is LA compared to Laramie)

            Prediction: Fresno State 31, Wyoming 17

St. Petersburg – December 19^th

            Rutgers v. Central Florida

Here’s a battle of Knights, version red and golden.  Rutgers coach Greg Schiano prides himself on being able to recruit in Florida, so this game will have a little more riding on it than the average bowl game.  Mid-tier recruits notwithstanding (seriously, no blue chipper from the Sunshine State is going to Jersey or Orlando unless they’ve been charged with a felony… Even then, they’ll probably elect to go to Tennessee), look for Rutgers to grind out a fairly, easy win.

            Prediction: Rutgers 26, Central Florida 13 

New Orleans – December 20^th

            Middle Tennessee v. Southern Miss

Southern Miss can score points in bunches (Just ask Houston) and Middle Tennessee’s marquee win was when they barely beat Maryland, possibly the worst team in a major conference.  This one won’t be for the defensive minded fan, but I don’t think people usually turn on the New Orleans Bowl for clinical football.

            Prediction: Southern Miss 55, Middle Tennessee 35

Las Vegas – December 22^nd

            BYU v. Oregon State

This one is the lone, marquee match-up in this year’s first week of bowls (sorry, USC-BC).  Can BYU slow down the Rodgers brothers?  Not Likely.  Will Max Hall write one last, statistically-insane chapter to his legend?  Perhaps (OSU slowed down Jeremiah Masoli, but not Andrew Luck and Matt Berkley).  This one is a toss-up, I just hope the scoreboard in Sin City has been serviced recently because it’ll get a workout with this game.

            Prediction: Oregon State 51, BYU 49

Poinsetta – December 23^rd

            Utah v. California

In the season’s first bowl game not named for a place, two schools, named for a place, play each other.  Utah is far removed from last year’s dream 13-0 season, but still has a talented squad.  Matt Riley’s Golden Bears are every bit as talented, and soft, as any squad he’s ever coached.  I’ll take heart and Mormonism in this one.

            Prediction: Utah 24, California 19

Hawaii – December 24^th

            SMU v. Nevada

This game will be a Homecoming for once favorite son, SMU Coach June Jones, who established an exciting program at the Univeristy of Hawaii.  Look for his SMU team to relish their first post-season visit in like 2934873 years with another high-scoring game against the Wolfpack.  Both teams are big on offense and not so much on defense.  I give the edge to Nevada since they have Hawaii in their conference, they shouldn’t be too fazed by the environment.

            Prediction: Nevada 62, SMU 45

Meineke Car Care – December 26^th

            UNC v. Pittsburgh

This should be titled the letdown bowl.  After promising expectations (in Pitts case, a great 9-3 season which saw them 1:45 away from being BCS-bound.  A horrible exchange… No offense, Charlotte), both these teams are left to rue over another pre-New Year’s bowl.  Which team will use this to launch their season for next year?  I’m guessing the Tar Heels, which only lose two starters combined on offense and defense and should threaten for a conference (and even National) championship next season.  Though, we’ve heard this before.

            Prediction: UNC 27, Pitt 21

Little Caesars – December 26^th

            Ohio v. Marshall

The only thing that tops my shock that Little Caesars still exists, and that they can sponsor a bowl game, is the fact that Marshall is playing in a bowl game.  Does this game pit the MAC #8 and MAC#9 teams?  Wow.  Does it even matter who wins this game?  I guess this doubles as some sort of rivalry.

            Prediction: Ohio 24, Marshall 10

Emerald – December 26^th

            USC v. Boston College

Ah… In one corner, we have the class of the college football world for the past decade finally having a mortal season.  In the other corner, we have Boston College who is just happy to be here.  If USC were to play like this were a gateway back to prominence for next season, this game wouldn’t be close.  However, I feel they’ll play pretty uninspired, dissatisfied with themselves and their season, and hoping to get over as soon as possible.  Unfortunately, Boston College doesn’t possess 1/5^th the talent to trouble the hapless Trojans.

            Prediction: USC 30, Boston College 17

Music City – December 27^th

            Kentucky v. Clemson

Like Pittsburgh, Clemson came oh so close to playing in a BCS game (the Pitt-Clemson ratings would’ve been abysmal.  The Orange Bowl Committee is much happier with the GT-Iowa matchup.  MUCH HAPPIER).  Alas, they’ll have to content themselves with Nashville, a definite downgrade from Miami.  Unfortunately for Kentucky, Dabo Swinney is now coaching the Tigers, as opposed to Tommy “I can’t win after Halloween” Bowden.  At least Kentucky can save on air fare and tell their grandkids they played against C.J. Spiller.

            Prediction: Clemson 44, Kentucky 27

Independence – December 28^th

            Georgia v. Texas A&M

Jerrod Johnson made himself a household name by leading in undermanned Aggies squad in a just-short upset bid over rival, Texas.  This game will determine whether he’s the frontrunner for All-Big 12 and (possibly) Walter Camp honors next year, or whether he’ll follow fellow underclassmen, Jimmy “Glass Jaw” Clausen into the draft.  Looking at what fellow Big 12 QB, Josh Freemen, was able to accomplish last year with a good combine (1^st round pick despite a largely mediocre, college career), Johnson might try his luck.  I think he could use another year, but who’d turn down guaranteed millions?

            Prediction: Texas A&M 38, Georgia 23

Eagle Bank – December 29^th

            UCLA v. Temple

Up until Saturday, this was going to be a three-way brawl (as the original line had Army/UCLA v. Temple), terrordome-style or Rick Neuheisel was waiting to the 11^th hour, trying to convince his team to fly cross country to beat up on an opponent of no consequence (In all seriousness, Army needed to beat their rivals, Navy, in order to secure the requisite win total to be bowl-eligible.  They didn’t.  Their loss is UCLA’s sorta gain).  The Owls, making their first bowl bid seemingly since Jim Thorpe spurned their Letter of Intent to sign with the Carlyle School, are ecstatic to have a post-season to play in and would’ve taken either opponent.  Unfortunately, Navy really wanted that Commander-and-Chief trophy.

            Prediction: UCLA 20, Temple 16

Champ Sports – December 29^th

            Miami (FL) v. Wisconsin

In what is now becoming a yearly rite of passage, Wisconsin will travel down to sunny Florida to get the crap kicked out of them by a more athletic, annoyed ACC team.  Last year, Florida State scored about 381294872 points on them after a lackluster season.  This year, look for Jacorry Harris and Company to take out a late season collapse on the Badgers.  This one will be over by halftime.

            Prediction: Miami (FL) 51, Wisconsin 17

Humanitarian – December 30^th

            Idaho v. Bowling Green

Welcome to big-time football, Idaho!  As a reward, you get to be featured, nation-wide televised, at your bigger, better in-state rival.  That’s gotta leave every Vandal smarting just a little bit… They can score and will do so often on the Falcons.

            Prediction: Idaho 63, Bowling Green 41

Texas – December 30^th

            Missouri v. Navy

This bowl might be over in less than three hours.  Neither team is particularly in love with the forward pass; Navy, because their triple option attack is so lethal, and Missouri, because they’re just not that good.  Navy almost upset Ohio State and finished off Notre Dame in South Bend.  Missouri plays in the weakest division in major college football and didn’t come close to winning the division. 

            Prediction: Navy 27, Missouri 16

Holiday – December 30^th

            Arizona v. Nebraska

San Diego is this year’s location for the official “Bride’s maid” Bowl.  Arizona saw their Rose Bowl dreams vanish in a Jeremiah Masoli OT TD, Nebraska saw their Fiesta Bowl dreams evaporate on a fortuitous, instant replay reversal which allowed Texas’ escape.  Ndamukong Suh will be the reason Nebraska wins this one…  I’m glad he didn’t win the Heisman.  That’s why they have the Outland Trophy.

            Prediction: Nebraska 23, Arizona 13

Armed Forces – December 31^st

            Air Force v. Houston

The Falcons are back to where long-time coach Fisher DeBerry constantly had the team back in the “hey day”s of the 90s.  While not ready to challenge Navy for the Commander-and-Chief Trophy, they’re not a far way off.  However, they’re a far way off of challenging Houston. 

            Prediction: Houston 59, Air Force 20

Sun – December 31^st

            Stanford v. Oklahoma

The Toby Gearhart bowl should be one of the most highly talked about bowls that have no real bearing on the future of anything.  Part of the talk will deal with Sooner coach Bob Stoops.  As one of the game’s highest paid coaches in especially recession-hit Oklahoma, Stoops’ salary, as well as the Sooners 7-5 record, will be the talk of bloggers.  Expect Gearhart to play with Heisman vengeance.

            Prediction: Stanford 23, Oklahoma 21

Insight – December 31^st

            Minnesota v. Iowa State

This game wins the “Wait… those teams are bowl eligible!?!?!” award.  The Gophers have a QB identity crisis and the Cyclones (who have an identity crisis of their own… they look like they’re wearing USC’s uniforms) were the first to expose the world to the fact that the Cornhuskers have no offense.  This one isn’t worth missing a New Year’s Eve party over.  Though, it does beat the slew of New Year’s eve specials.

            Prediction: Minnesota 14, Iowa State 12

Chick-Fil-A – December 31^st

            Virginia Tech v. Tennessee

Some games, especially this one, feel like they should be rivalry games and played on a semi-regular basis.  These two, separated by 236 loosely populated miles, have been brand names in the College Football world for quite some time that it’s a wonder how they haven’t found a way to renew acquaintances more often.  The similarities don’t stop there as Lane Kiffin seems to be bringing a Frank Beamer-esque toxic atmosphere to the banks of Knoxville.  Look for Tyrod Taylor and friends to save some face for a lackluster 2009 season in emphatic fashion.

            Prediction: Virginia Tech 31, Tennessee 7

Outback – January 1^st

            Northwestern v. Auburn

The Gene Chizik Era started off with “Told you so!” enthusiasm (5-0) and finished with a more expected result (2-5, with one win over a FBS team).  However, I do give Chizik credit for assembling a staff of “us vs. the world”ers (headlined by the always vengeful Gus Malzahn and his super powered offense).  Now, the test will be what he does next year in a loaded SEC West.  A good start would be to beat an overmatched Wildcat squad.  If betting were legal, I’d take Northwestern to cover the spread.

            Prediction: Auburn 27, Northwestern 24

Capital One – January 1^st

            Penn State v. LSU

Joe Paterno must be loving life right now.  With Bobby Bowden’s retirement, he stands alone, with no other challengers within sight, at the precipice of the coaching profession (in terms of wins).  I expect him to coast for the next few years, getting eight to nine wins in the “competitive” Big 10, and calling it a career, handing over the reins to his son.  That being said, look for Penn State to win most of the games they should, and none of the ones they shouldn’t.  This game falls into the latter category.

            Prediction: LSU 20, Penn State 9

Gator – January 1^st

            Florida State v. West Virginia

Here’s the final curtain call for two legends as long-time Defensive Coordinator, Mickey Andrews, and Hall of Fame Head Coach, Bobby Bowden, take the sideline for the final time (at least as Florida State coaches).  The whole notion of “win one for us” will be out there from every news outlet with even a semblance of coverage for the game and it will carry the day.  Unfortunately, this middling-to-average Seminole squad should’ve invoked that strategy against a flawed Gator team in the season finale as opposed to a very limited Mountaineer team.  Oh well, look for Noel Devine and Tavon Austin to make it interesting.

            Prediction: Florida State 30, West Virginia 24

Rose – January 1^st

            Ohio State v. Oregon

The Granddaddy of them all isn’t exactly your granddaddy’s Rose Bowl.  The Buckeyes and Ducks should put on an aerial display with two of the game’s most exciting QBs in Jeremiah Masoli and Tyrelle Pryor, but the game will hinge on defense.  Unfortunately, the Buckeyes haven’t really stepped up their game and will need a Herculean effort from Pryor to overcome the Ducks.  Unfortunately, Pryor hasn’t brought one of those this season (see: Ohio St.-USC and Ohio St.-Purdue) and Masoli has twice (see: Oregon-Arizona and Oregon-Oregon State).

            Prediction: Oregon 34, Ohio St. 23

Sugar – January 1^st

            Florida v. Cincinnati

Last we saw wunderkid, Tim Tebow, he was pulling an Adam Morrison as the final moments of the SEC Championship game ticked away.  Now, as he makes his annual Award show circuit, he’ll be reminded daily of his teary eyed defeat and we’ll get a chance to see the real Tim Tebow.  Will he wilt, lose his confidence, and fade into oblivion (a la Adam Morrison) or will he show resolve, fire up his teammates, and obliterate the Bearcats in New Orleans?  I’m thinking somewhere between the two (not that he’s not tough, but he’s only lost seven times out of fifty four career games, two of his last twenty-six… this is an unusual feeling for him and his teammates).  I’m expecting a tough, gritty Gator win (this was written before Brian Kelly took the Notre Dame job… Florida is going to knock the Bearcats back to irrelevance)

            Prediction: Florida 41, Cincinnati 13

International – January 2^nd

            South Florida v. Northern Illinois

It has been quite some time that we’ve seen a four-year, successful starter so easily forgotten in the wake of a true freshmen’s promise (last occurrence: Florida 2006), yet, that is the case at South Florida.  B.J. Daniels has all but erased program-maker Matt Groethe (for good reason… Daniels is superior in every single way.  Speaking of that, Brother A.J. made a funny remark about the Yankees recently signing Curtis Granderson in relation to Johnny Damon: “That’s it for Damon.  Granderson is better in every conceivable way that one can be better than someone else.  He’s faster, younger, more successful with the ladies… his charities raise more money.  He’s better!”.  South Florida in a blowout, unless the Toronto cold prevails.

            Prediction: South Florida 34, Northern Illinois 16

Papajohns.com – January 2^nd

            Connecticut v. South Carolina

Still reeling from the death of star Cornerback, Jasper Howard, UCONN has pressed through this season, courageously and unified.  While that didn’t show up on the scoreboard the first three games after Howard’s murder, it has the past few weeks in a major way.  Look for the Huskies to keep the streak going in one more tribute to their fallen brother and for Coach Randy Edsell to be on a short list of the various, coaching vacancies.  Though, how could he leave a school, and players, after forming such a permanent bond with them?  How could he stay at a school with that dark mark hanging over him?

            Prediction: Connecticut 20, South Carolina 16

Cotton – January 2^nd

            Mississippi v. Oklahoma State

Here is a bowl featuring two teams that were expected to have an outside shot at getting to Pasadena for the BCS Championship.  Once again, we find, championships aren’t won in August (but through luck and follow-through).  Mike “I’m still a man!  I’m 41!!” Gundy is in more dire straits as his team gagged away a BCS bowl berth down the stretch and his star QB had a total loss of confidence, Flacco Fever (yes, I’m bitter this very attainable, Ravens season is slipping away before my eyes).  Houston Nutt, the king of gadgetry, is the ultimate trickster who will relish three weeks to game plan.

            Prediction: Mississippi 34, Oklahoma State 26

Liberty – January 2^nd

            East Carolina v. Arkansas

This game is usually an annual blowout waiting to happen.  Conference USA is, usually, not in the same league as the SEC (which is why we don’t have a play-off).  However, this year may be an exception.  Though, that has nothing to do with the caliber of Skip Holtz’ Pirates (they’re good), but, more so, with the rebuilding going on with Bobby Petrino’s Razorbacks.  Ryan Mallet is going to be a star; he’s just not there yet.  This one will be close, but I give it to the hogs and their superior athletes.

            Prediction: Arkansas 30, East Carolina 19

Alamo – January 2^nd

            Michigan State v. Texas Tech

I can’t pretend to care about this game.  I’m tired of reading articles about “how smart” and “how advanced” Bob Leach, and his Red Raiders’ offenses, has become over the years.  Until he can pretend to care about defense, I can’t take them seriously (obviously, last year was an exception.  Though, Crabtree is just that good).  On the other side, you have the Spartans which are abysmal in every sense.  This one won’t be pretty.

            Prediction: Texas Tech 44, Michigan State 23

Fiesta – January 4^th

            TCU v. Boise State

Here is a game that should’ve happened during the regular season.  I think that, in order to end all of this mid-major for BCS conversation, the Mountain West champion should play the WAC champion.  That way, we’ll have one qualified winner come out that should contend with the rest of the major conference teams.  That’s unfair, you say?  Then these programs should dedicate their athletic programs to reaching the level of a major conference and apply for membership.  Beside the point, I know, TCU has too much defense and just enough offense.

            Prediction: TCU 27, Boise State 22

Orange – January 5^th

            Iowa v. Georgia Tech

How did the 2-loss Hawkeyes get into a BCS bowl?  No one really knows.  Though, it has more to do with other team’s deficiencies than the merits of Iowa.  Look for their slow defense to be run ragged by the misdirection of the Yellow Jackets triple option attack. 

            Prediction: Georgia Tech 37, Iowa 17

GMAC – January 6^th

            Troy v. Central Michigan

The victory lap for prolific Chippewas’ QB, Dan LeFevour, will be as impressive as his four years at Central Michigan.  Lost in all the Tim Tebow hoopla are the otherworldly stats that LeFevour has put up in his career.  LeFevour is the only player in NCAA history to have over 12,000 passing yards and 2,500 rushing yards and is the record holder for most total touchdowns in a career.  Look for him to substantially add to both totals in this one.

            Prediction: Central Michigan 56, Troy 31

BCS Title Game – January 7^th

            Texas v. Alabama

Congratulations to Mark Ingram, the second sophomore to win the Heisman trophy.  Unfortunately, this may be the highlight of his career.  Check the track record of running backs, not named Herschel Walker, who absorb this much of a beating so early in their career.  Doesn’t look good.  I think he may have peaked, athletically, and may not be able to make the transition to being an elite Sunday player.  I see a lot of Eric Rhett in him.  Speaking of not translating, poor Colt McCoy.  Four years of winning and big stats and success without major hardware to show for it (he had the unfortunate luck to be placed in an era of other, prolific QBs).  Finally, McCoy is getting his shot at a national title.  Regrettably, he also has his weakest supporting cast.  The, supposed, equalizer was the weak play of Alabama’s QB, Greg McElroy, which was disproved in the SEC title game.  Nick Saban and the Tide will clinch their first National title since 1993.

            Prediction: Alabama 27, Texas 17

NFL Wrap-Up!! FUN TIMES IN CLEVELAND

I meant to do this ranking prior to Week 9, since that’s the unofficial midway point of the season, but I got caught up in the resurgence of Carolina football (two top 25 teams in two weeks!!)

Without further ado:  

New Orleans Saints and Indianapolis Colts

“We poppin like Champagne Bottles, but we never shook”

-Lil’ Wayne “Money 2 Blow” Remix 

That has to be the theme in New Orleans and Indianapolis as the Saints finally have a defense to go with their prolific offense and the Colts still have Peyton Manning.  As the last two undefeated teams in football, there really is nothing that worries these teams, especially the Colts who disposed of their chief rival on Sunday Night.  Stay tuned as both have tough match-ups coming up.  Colts in the ultimate grudge match (I think they may have played in Baltimore at some point…) and Saints (The Patriots come to town soon).

 

New England Patriots, San Diego Chargers, and Minnesota Vikings

“Don’t think I don’t think about it”

-Darius Rucker “Don’t think I don’t think about it”

Each team has to have certain moments from the season on their mind.  The Patriots are one foot away (on a fourth down conversion against the Colts) from knocking off the AFC’s top team and putting distance between them and a middling division.  The Chargers are one sensational fourth down play (see: Lewis, Ray vs. Sproles, Darren) away from challenging for the AFC’s top spots.  The Vikings are one mishandled Chester Taylor pass away from perfection.  Though, each team is playing at a high level, which helps to quell those “what if’s”.  On a sidenote:  Props to Darius Rucker, Country newcomer of the year.

 

Cincinatti Bengals

“I’ll step on your porch, step to your boss/Let’s end the speculation, I’m talking to all you.”

-Jay-Z “Ain’t no Love (Heart of the City”)

Marvin Lewis has the Queen City Team playing like a bunch of bullies.  The Bengals are wearing the “Me against the world” title better than anyone this side of Tupac and the mid-90s Knicks.  Punishing defense, crushing run game (even more now that they’ve signed Larry “I didn’t mean to insult homosexuals, just Todd Haley” Johnson)… Still.  I don’t believe in them.  That “Hard Knocks” series before the season revealed something (not as much as I thought as I made constant “So this is what a 4-12 team looks like” remarks), but something.  I’m not ready to put them up in the second tier division, yet.  I know they swept the Ravens and Steelers, but still… there’s something still lacking.

 

Denver Broncos, Pittsburgh Steelers, Dallas Cowboys, Philadelphia Eagles, and Atlanta Falcons

“Woe is me, baby, this is tragic/ ‘Cause we had it, we was magic/ I was flyin’, now I’m crashin’”

-Kanye West “Knock you Down”

Each of these teams went from being sky high to well, not.  The Broncos started the season media darlings before being brought back to earth by the Ravens and Steelers in consecutive weeks, understandable.  However, the inexcusable thrashing they suffered at the hands of the Washington Clinton Portis’ was baffling.  The Steelers, more understandably, were swept by the Bengals.  The Cowboys were upended by the Brokeback Packers (not a gay diss, just an Aaron Rodgers diss… He looks like Jake Gyllenhal) who haven’t been able to win many games (only three out of their last ten!!).  The Eagles suffered back-to-back losses that weren’t very close.  The Falcons just lost to the Panthers…

Needless to say, each of these teams needs to regroup, much like Kanye in this whole post-award show backlash.

 

New York Giants, Miami Dolphins, and Baltimore Ravens

 “Reasons, like seasons, they constantly change and the seasons of last year, like reasons, have faded away.”

-Something Corporate “Me and the Moon”

The success of last season has (mostly) been missing for these teams.  All of them have struggled with the pre-season expectations and (more likely) their adjusted schedules.  The Giants raced out fast only to quickly be in search of answers losing four of their last five.  The Dolphins have introduced a lot of new wrinkles to their wildcat formation without the electric success from last year.  The Ravens have lost four games by an average of 5.3 points, the close games they thrived on finding ways to win last year.  Just like the tier above and below these teams, they need to find a way to right the ship or the next season (off-season) could be filled with many, discontenting reasons.

 

New York Jets, Tennessee Titans, Jacksonville Jaguars, Chicago Bears, Arizona Cardinals, and San Francisco 49ers

“But heaven ain’t close in a place like this/Anything goes but don’t blink you might miss.”

-The Killers “Somebody Told Me”

What a grab bag of teams here… Each team has been great and awful this year (as has everyone else); however, these teams tend to be less “killers” than anything else.  Though, as with every season, each team still has a glimmer of hope to redeem what’s left, but, if they blink, they’ll miss.  Can Mark Sanchize pull a Matt Ryan/Joe Flacco and get his entourage to the play-offs?  Can Vince Young keep up his magic (3-0 since he became the starter)?  Can Maurice Jones-Drew carry the whole team every week?  Will Jay Cutler continue to try his hardest to submarine the play-off chances of the Bears?  Does anyone want to win the NFC West!?!?!?!  By week 12, we will know all of these answers and more.

 

Carolina Panthers, Green Bay Packers, and Houston Texans

“Maybe, in the future, you’re gonna come back, you’re gonna come back to me.”

-Ingrid Michaelson “Maybe”

This is surely what the QBs of these three teams are saying in terms of their fan support.  Donnie Darko-Rodgers caught a break with a win over Tony “It must be getting cold outside because I’m losing games I should win” Romo and the Cowboys, but Green Bay won’t forget he’s not Favre (especially with the Vikings having swept the Packers already this season).  Poor Jake of the man, Steve Smith and the Charlotte fans are done with him.  It’s official.  They’re now, firmly, in the Sam Bradford/Troy Smith Sweepstakes.  As for Houston, all the passing yards look nice, Matt Schaub, but win a game of importance or stay healthy for a whole season.  Either one would be nice at this point.

 

Washington Redskins, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, and Seattle Seahawks

“I know that it’s coming, I just hope that I’m alive for it.”

-Drake “Successful”

Yes, this entry needed a follow-up lyric to the first installment.  That’s really all there is to say about these teams.  Poor Clinton Portis and Jason Campbell… I would say I’m surprised by Josh Johnson play except that I’m more surprised by how well Josh Freeman has played.  He’s been consistent and stepped up when he needs to most… the two things he embarrassingly lacked at K-State.  The Ron Prince Era looks better and better.  Oh, and Matt Hasselback was washed up two seasons ago.  I’m frantically searching for evidence to the contrary.

 

Buffalo Bills, Detroit Lions, and Oakland Raiders

“See potential in ya, let me mould that/I can transform ya, I can transform ya.”

-Chris Brown “I can Transform Ya”

This one goes out to the young Bills (Marshawn Lynch, Fred Jackson, and Roscoe Parrish), young Lions (Matt Stafford, Calvin Johnson, and Kevin Smith), and young Raiders (Darren McFadden, Michael Bush, Louis Murphy, and JaMarcus Russell… Well, maybe not Russell).  Better times are coming guys.  Whether that means you get traded to well-managed franchises or you’re indentured until you hit free agency, hope is out there.  Or your GM could talk himself into Tebow being the Spread QB to break the trend and you get to chase after his wobbly ducks all next season.  It could really go either way at this point.

 

St. Louis Rams and Kansas City Chiefs

“It never stops, when my mama ask me will I change/ I tell her yeah, but it’s clear I’ll always be the same.”

-Tupac “Until the End of Time”

It feels like the Rams and Chiefs will continue to be horrible until the end of time.  The Rams can’t find anyone to buy them and will probably end up moving back to LA where they weren’t really liked in the first place.  If they were smart, they’d change their name in transit.  Maybe fool the West Coast into thinking they were someone else for a few years.  Steven Jackson is football’s version of Zach Greinke.  The Chiefs are a mess and I blame Todd Haley.  One person hasn’t ruined a team this badly since Toni Braxton was making her rounds in Dallas.  How do you alienate a future hall of famer (Tony Gonzales), a perennial pro bowl running back (Well, Larry Johnson has his own demons and would’ve self-destructed eventually… but Haley hurried the process), and a rising star wide receiver (Dwayne Bowe, too, is a moron, but at least he doesn’t post moronic Twitter updates and inspire a whole city to petition him out of town)?  Herm Edwards and Carl Petersen just keep smiling wider and brighter each week on their respective television appearances.

 

Cleveland Browns

“We see the sun about three times a year!”

-Hastily made Cleveland Tourism Video

This is, roughly, the same number of wins Browns fans can expect in any given season… And now they want to use Lebron in football games!?!?!  Whose idea was it to bring football back here, again? 

Altered by Bias

Two names have always hovered above my life (especially my athletic one) like the way a foul stench floats above a rotting pile of garbage. Two names of people I never met, but whose legacies are inescapable.

Hank Gathers and Len Bias.

I’ll write about the former another time, however, the latter, having been the focus on ESPN’s 30 for 30 series recently, has brought him back into my waking conscious.

Len Bias.

He was an unstoppable small forward who seemed to jump out of the gym to dunk or shoot over everyone. One of the few people who, legitimately, could say he owned Michael Jordan. The #2 overall pick who would’ve been going to the defending champion, Boston Celtics, in the 1986 NBA Draft (behind the serviceable, Brad Daugherty… Though, eerily, it was also the Dražen Petrović draft). The pride of Maryland (as a Marylander, I know, first-hand, the Napoleon Complex we have in sports… Though, pound-for-pound, no other state has put out as many quality hoop stars as The Old Line State).

Dead at 22.

As is the case with catastrophic events, especially an untimely demise, the means of the event always resonates greater than the life and causes leading up to the event.

The great Len Bias died of a drug overdose.

Virtually every athlete of my generation, especially those from Maryland, knows that. Over the past twenty-three years we’ve heard it countless times from countless people: Just as we’re leaving home before going out to a party. Celebrating in the winning locker room just as the post-game speech is breaking up. Pre-Season drug education course. Old players coming back to speak before Homecoming.

Don’t end up like Len Bias.

That sentence was the epitaph for any possibility of youthful enjoyment. The indestructible man finding out that he was not. The mistake that prematurely ended the Boston Dynasty. Take care lest you suffer his same fate. It was the main reason I never contemplated hard drug use.

The other night, the program brought back every buried fear, the unspoken trepidations that dogged every corner of every party I ever went. My Dad told me he was driving down I-95 North, just outside Baltimore, when he found out about Len Bias. My uncle told me he had just woken up from a raucous night of partying himself when he found out (he, subsequently, reformed his ways).

What he did, who he was, and how he lived (and ultimately died) touched us all.

So thank you, Leonard Kevin Bias. You inspired us all on the court, and taught us an invaluable lesson off of it.

The Biggest Game No One is Talking About

On October 22, as usual, ESPN will broadcast a College Football game.  However, this game will not be like the hundreds the network has shown before on its signature, Thursday night showcase.
More than just a football game will be on the line in Chapel Hill,  when the Seminoles of Florida State come to town to face the University of North Carolina Tar Heels.

Two football program’s futures hang in the very balance and will swing, dramatically, and possibly, irrevocably, with a win or loss.

Each team must win this game…

While, this can be said of many games being played on any given weekend in College Football, this is more than rhetoric for this particular match-up.  This isn’t a matter of one side trying to push through to rarefied air against an opponent willing to do anything to stop them (see: BYU vs. TCU).  This isn’t one side trying to cement their status as this decade’s dynasty against another trying to salvage anything redeemable from the past ten years (see: Florida vs. Miss St).  This is a rising star trying to stay on course against one of the most proud, elite, fading Patriarchal powers hoping for one last glimmer of glory.

Each team must win this game…

The 1990s were as kind to Florida State as any decade has been to any university (with the exception of the ’70s to Oklahoma), as the Seminoles claimed parts of five national championships with two of those being outright.  However, as the proliferation of new offenses and television contracts, the depth of talent and dominance has faded just as the black from the hair of their iconic coach, Bobby Bowden.  Now, after an unprecedented run of top 5 finishes, the Seminoles are flirting with “above average”, something distasteful to their fan base accustomed to bowl games with more prestige than the Emerald Nuts Bowl.  Florida State finds itself just like Kanye West in We Were Once a Fairytale, stumbling around the unranked bowels of the FBS trying to make sense of it all.

This season’s installment of Seminoles is off to a 2-4 start (with the lone bright spot being a win over BYU), one of the worst in Bowden’s legendary, 30+ year run at the school.  Furthering this unfortunate situation, the usual murmur of disapproval, the norm since the glory days of the ’90s, has been ratcheted up to a buzzsaw of dissatisfaction, as notable Board Members have joined the annual call for Bowden to step down.  “The Game has passed him by!” they say,”He’s too old” they jeer, “He never got over being forced to fire his son” they infer…  Big time recruits hear it and since things aren’t right in Tallahassee, dodging the Seminoles for other schools of late, especially their two rivals (Miami and Florida).  Even more unsettling, there are rumors of a schism in the locker room.  Players are torn between the lead of the Living Legend, Bowden, and the Head Coach-in-waiting, Jumbo Fisher.  Nothing would quell the silence like taking out an up-and-comer on a national stage.  Nothing would announce that Bowden isn’t ready to be “retired” like a rousing victory over a capable opponent.  Nothing would get the blue chips attentions like a much needed, big game W.

Florida State must win this game…

North Carolina announced to the world that it was on its way back to the Mack Brown Era dominance of the 1990s with their shocking destruction of Rutgers last year on a Nationally Televised game (also on ESPN).  Their big play offense and tenacious defense were the calling card of their Coach, Butch Davis, who had used a similar formula to restore the University of Miami to prominence at the close of the 1990s and early 2000s.  However, save for another televised win over Notre Dame, the Tar Heels season swooned in the latter half of last season (see: UNC-NC State, UNC-UMD, and UNC-UVA).

Recruiting took a hit, as a result, and a few key, in-state prospects chose to skip the call of their home state and play elsewhere (Florida and South Carolina being two beneficiaries of these decisions).  This stumble in recruiting (the first two seasons under Butch Davis had brought top 10 recruiting classes to Chapel Hill, compared with a #23 class this past season) mixed with a few key injuries has left the program’s progress in doubt.  The doubt has been justified by early backtracks this year (a narrow escape over UCONN, a competitive loss to Georgia Tech, and a shocking loss to previously winless UVA) has the bandwagon ready to be derailed.  Once again, the Tar Heel faithful are counting down the days until Roy Williams’ defending National Champion basketball squad takes the court.  Carolina will always be a basketball school, but continued success will give Butch Davis’ squads a place on the same stage as the hoopsters.

Despite the early struggles, the Tar Heels, coming off a bye and a solid victory (granted, it came against FCS member, Georgia Southern), are seeing momentum, and once injured starters, return.  The best way to salvage the lofty goals for this season (compete for an ACC title, go to a major bowl), along with the half dozen (or so) blue chip recruits in the state that are, coincidentally enough, considering both schools, would be a huge statement win in this game. 

North Carolina must win this game…

Just as the long-term future of both programs are tenuous, so, too, are their short-term prospects.  While UNC has a better record than FSU (4-2), those two losses have both come in league play.  In the Atlantic Coast Conference, two losses are damaging to a team’s chances to win their division, but three losses would all but eliminate a team from competing for the league crown (especially in a division with nationally ranked Virginia Tech (3-1 in league play), Georgia Tech (4-1, and owners of a tiebreaker with UNC), and Miami (2-1) looming).  Even if the Tar Heels were to win this game, their shot at a title is pretty long (In all accounts, they’re probably one year away), but they would still have one. 

FSU, with a loss, would have five on the year.  With away games at Clemson and Wake Forest (two schools they’ve struggled with over the past two years… Struggle would be putting it kindly.  Obama’s Health Care initiative is struggling.  Florida State has been dreadful against each team.  They haven’t beaten Wake Forest since 2005 and have only two victories over the Tigers in the last six seasons) and a season ending trip to the Swamp (rival and #2 ranked University of Florida), a bowl bid would seem very unlikely.  The Seminoles haven’t missed the post-season since 1982… No one on their current roster (I or last year’s roster) was alive when this happened.  Such a catastrophic event would almost certainly bring an end to the Bowden Regime.

Both teams must win this game…

As the 8:00 pm kick-off time draws near, I know where I will find myself on Thursday night.  ESPN will be on in my home, my eyes anxiously waiting to bear witness to either a continuing coronation of the resurgent Tar Heels or the last flicker of the smoldering ashes of the Seminoles once luminous dynasty.

NFL Wrap-up! D.O.W (Death of Washington)

After three weeks of the NFL, here’s what we know, a short wrap-up of each team:

(note: this saves me from having to write an entry blasting the ACC in College Football for their, save Virginia Tech, horridly, uneven performance this year…)

Atlanta Falcons and Baltimore Ravens

“Yeah, I want it all, That’s why I strive for it/Dis me and you’ll never hear a reply for it” -Drake “Successful”

I’m not quite ready to apologize to Matt Ryan (The Patriots won’t be the only team smart enough to put a man over the top against Roddy White and put a safety on Gonzales) and I’ve written my apology note to Joe Flacco, but I won’t put it in the mail until the outcome of this weekend’s Ravens-Patriots Game (also known as the “why didn’t they introduce flex games starting in week 2?” bowl).  However, both QBs are off to a hotter start than I foresaw and I hope it continues (especially for Joe Flacco).

NY Giants

“Life’s a maze, you twist and you turn through it/ The driest of droughts, maneuvered and I earned through it” -Pusha T of Clipse “Kinda Like a Big Deal”

I don’t know what to make of them.  I’m not ready to get on the “Eli Express”… What have they done, really?  They trounced two awful teams in the Bucs and Redskins and escaped against an overrated, though, motivated at the time, Cowboys team (Courtesy of Tony “I’m this decade’s Jim Everitt” Romo).  Unfortunately, Manning and ‘em can continue to act like they’re kinda a big deal for the next two week as they get the Chiefs and equally woeful Raiders, before a real test in New Orleans… Speaking of the Saints.

New Orleans Saints

“It was a few years ago, but I remember the summer/50 made fans start lookin’ at the numbers” -Joe Budden “Who pt. 1″

Bill Belicheck isn’t 50, but, in 2007, his aerial assault made the fans start talking about offensive stats and not really about championships (which they didn’t win, by the way).  Now, we have Sean Payton and Drew Brees lighting up the scoreboard this season like they have something to prove.  Well, I guess since they can’t really build a serious contender down there, they might as well set some records (that may have been the case last year, but this year seems to be a changed story… so far).

Indianapolis Colts, Philadelphia Eagles, and San Francisco 49ers

“Its crazy how you can go from being joe blow/To everybody on your dick, no homo.” -Kanye West “Run this town”

This surely must’ve been the motto of first year coach Jim Caldwell and Stand-in QB Kevin Kolb.  Caldwell has been proving he’s more than a Rooney Rule hire by getting the Colts off to a hot start; Kolb proved that last year’s game work was just early jitters (which everyone gets going against the Ravens’ defense) and blowing up.  Quietly, each, like Kanye, is showing up a legend (The Colts look a lot more cohesive than Dungy had them early on last year; The Eagles sure looked more like a big play team than when McNabb was at the helm most of last year).  Though, neither one of them is doing it alone (see: Manning, Peyton and Jackson, DeSean).  As for the 49ers, they may be the new media darlings and have a pretty dope head coach, but don’t get it twisted.  They’re a mix of: not bad and crappy division. Smells like a home defeat in the NFC Divisional Round…

Minnesota Vikings, New England Patriots, San Diego Chargers, and Dallas Cowboys

“Old School Rappers, who I wouldn’t be around without/Ain’t got shit to say, but keep putting albums out” -Canibus “Box cutta”

Don’t be fooled by the early returns for these three franchises.  They are all equally flawed and I don’t know what can happen this season to fix them… Favre is too old to go all 16 and Tarvaris’ confidence is non-existent when he’ll be needed to stand in (not to mention that people are going to figure out that Percy Harvin is the only other playmaker on offense other than Peterson).  Brady isn’t back from injury (I know, stating the obvious) and I don’t think you can play your way into not being scared your surgically repaired Knee doesn’t get re-blown out. Just doesn’t happen (not to mention their defense is uhmm… suspect).  Will San Diego’s defense ever stop anyone’s running game?  I think Dallas’ achillies heel is obvious (see: Romo, Tony).

Green Bay Packers, Denver Broncos, Cincinatti Bengals, and NY Jets

“And could i be a star/does fame in this game have to change who you are?” -J.Cole “A Star is Born”

Just like J. Cole, none of these teams will get to find out the answer to the question posed in the lyrics.  Would you really be willing to bet any money Aaron “Please stop making Jake Gyllenhall jokes” Rodgers from week to week?  Me neither.  Can’t be a contender like that... Denver and Cincinatti have more holes than the script for “Funny People” with a quarter of the star power.  As for the Jets, luck eventually evens out on top of the inevitable destruction awaiting them in Foxboro… For the record, I was the first person to start the “Mark-Sanchez-looks-like-Vinny-Chase” joke.

Chicago Bears

“How you think your man died?/More money than respect, It wasn’t close, it was by a landslide” -Jadakiss “Air it Out”

This one is dedicated to you, Mr. Cutler.  I’m not even going to make the Jeff George joke because it’s too funny and obvious not to be true… If this team is still in play-off contention by Week 15, its by a lack of talent in their division/conference.  Matt Forte, please wake up. The season started a few weeks ago… Seriously.

Jacksonville Jaguars, Carolina Panthers, Arizona Cardinals, Tennessee Titans, and Pittsburgh Steelers

“I just can seem to get out this slump, If I could just get over this hump/
But I need something to pull me out this dump, I took my bruises, took my lumps/ Fell down and I got right back up.” – Eminem “Beautiful”

Don’t worry, you guys.  The beginning of the season has been tough on you and a lot of the high hopes that existed in pre-season are gone (in the case of Nashville and Phoenix, LONG gone), but brighter days are ahead… Trust me, you each have too much talent on your rosters for the rest of your season to be like this (don’t think I’m above trying to put a reverse jinx on the Steelers.  I hope they don’t win another game the rest of this season)… Call me crazy, but I think the worst is over for Delhomme.

Miami Dolphins, Buffalo Bills, Houston Texans, Oakland Raiders, Seattle Seahawks, Tampa Bay Bucs

“Your style is like dying in my sleep, I don’t feel it” -Eminem “Any Man”

Yes, this blog needed two Eminem song lyrics… Deal with it.  These teams are all pretty boring and awful.  Deal with it, but not as bad as…

Kansas City Chiefs, Cleveland Browns, and St. Louis Rams

“Last week it was funny, but now the jokes wearing thin” -Ben Folds “Steven’s Last Night in Town”

All three of these teams have new coaches that have killed their honeymoon faster than proposing a threesome with the Hotel’s front desk girl… Unfortunately, every Rams fan must deal with the feeling that every night (unless until the trade deadline, which provides a bit of a respite until the offseason) might be Steven’s (Jackson) last night in town.

Detroit Lions

“I think I might give away a million bucks/I think I might give away a brand new truck/’Cause I feel good, yeah, I feel good!” - Maino “A Million Bucks”

This is surely the sentiment being expressed by the owner after his team won their first game since 2007 (not a typo).

Last, and least, the team that gave Detroit their first win…

Washington Redskins

“I know we facing a recession/but the music y’all making gonna make it the great depression.” - Jay-Z “D.O.A”

With Multi Billionaire Millionaire owner, Dan Synder, investments bottoming out faster than Tila Tequila’s dating prospects, it must’ve done him a world of good to see his $100 million Defensive Tackle being carted off the field… Though, what was left on the field probably eased that pain some.  Way to go, Deadskins.  You gave Detroit reason to hope… Unfortunately for you, you have an offensive genius of a coach that’s not really much of either one and you’re in the toughest division in sports.  Forget the play-offs, how can this team manage to win 6 games this year? Anyone?

Don’t worry… what you hear is the collective sound of southern MD and Northern VA driving their cars into the Potomac…

Fantasy CPR

OK, yes…it took a fantasy football post to bring me out of retirement.

First off, my co-poster’s points need to be addressed.  For the most part, either he’s playing in a league featuring only his brothers and girlfriend or else he’s been drinking skunky beer.  Calvin Johnson in the 4th???  OK…

1) Good point, but what he doesn’t tell you is that his #1 avoider, Mr. MJD, is a candidate for MVP in a PPR league.  If the guy falls to 4th or 5th in your draft, you’ve gotten a steal, my friends.

2) A good defense can win or lose a week for you, depending on scoring in your league.  That’s why it’s not a bad idea to go with a Pittsburgh/NY Giants/Tennessee/Minnesota in the mid-to-late rounds.  Again, it depends on the depth of your league, but if you’re in the usual 10-12 teamer (on which I’m basing most of my recommendations), having the Steelers in the 9th round is a smart move.

Kickers, on the other hand: definitely wait.  Don’t be afraid to use your last pick and laugh at the guy who took Gostowski in the 7th.  I’ve never had a year where I didn’t pick up a top kicker off the wire.

3) WRs….it just depends.  Fitzgerald is changing the game by being a frequent 1st round pick.  But do you bite?  At the risk of losing out on a solid RB, especially when he’s ranked ahead of Slaton and Gore in most drafts, I say no.  But, if you’ve got one of the last picks of round 1 (and therefore one of the first ones in round 2) and #11 is still available (and you’ve already scooped up a Slaton-type runner), I say go for it.  For the rest of us, go with a star RB and then let the Mosses and Johnsons (both of them) come to you.  And if none of those guys are on the board, don’t be afraid of Boldin.  He may be a #2 receiver, but on that offense he gets stats like a #1.

4) I also believe in Brady this year, but I’m also the guy who’s going to tell you that it’s OK to wait on a QB.  If you have enough patience to stock up on RBs and WRs for the first 5-6 rounds, there will be gold waiting for you in the form of the Matts (Ryan and Schaub) and good ol’ Donovan McNabb (who has more weapons than Rambo this year).  Plus, if your roster is that stacked by that point, you’ll also have the luxury of pulling potential QB sleepers Carson Palmer or Matt Hasselbeck as your back-up.

5) Handcuffing can be valuable, especially in the form of the next-in-line for oft-injured RBs.  My top ones this year are:

• Rashard Mendenhall –> Willie Parker is past due for an inspection, and he’s going to break down before he gets to the garage
• LeSean McCoy –> Do I believe in Westbrook?  See below.  Do I believe in a late-round pick paying dividends come Week 5?  Yes.
• Felix Jones –> Not sure if he counts as a handcuff since he’s going to figure so much into the Cowboys’ offense, but I’d rather get him in the 10th than Marion Barber in the 3rd or 4th.

Along with the above 3, my top draft sleepers also include Earl Bennett (the guy did very well with Cutler at Vandy) and Hasselbeck (he’s gonna get you top 10 production for cheap, folks).  Ray Rice (gotta love him) was a sleeper until a month ago when everyone realized he would be the top back for the Ravens.  Not that I trust playing a Ravens RB, especially with McGahee recently expressing his love for the goal-line, but now I’m seeing him go in the top 6 rounds.  Are these rookies drafting?  Sheesh!

As for my All-RB-Special Avoiders List (pick these guys early and it’s your ass):

• Brian Westbrook –> he’s going to get hurt and he’s going to break your 1st-round-picking heart
• Chris Johnson –> great in PPR leagues, but LenDale White is going to steal more TDs than it’s worth
• Thomas Jones –> he doesn’t want to be there, the Jets don’t want him, and they’ve got a replacement set up
• Jonathan Stewart –> injury aside, this is DeAngelo’s team.  6-10 random TDs still isn’t worth it
• Cedric Benson –> sure, he’s tops on the Bengals RB chart…for now

As for TO, I’m going with Bengals instead: a former one (T.J. Housh) and a current one (Ochocinco).  Both are primed to impress this season and are much safer than Mr. Buffalo Implosion.

Happy drafting and I look forward to seeing more of you soon.

-Edwin

Fantasy Fix

You probably already had your fantasy drafts, but just in case, here’s 15 quick tips to keep in mind.

I know, I’m getting lazy…

1) Be mindful of the way receiving points are broken down.  Point, or even partial point, per reception leagues can make Matt Forte more valuable than Adrian Peterson, Chris Johnson over a Micheal Turner

2) Don’t draft a defense or kicker before the last two rounds.  The order of which doesn’t really matter.   There’s really not enough of a difference, week to week, to make it worth your while to take a Bironas over a Prater… If you don’t know who those names, you need to do some more research

3) Wide Receivers are like hook-ups at a college party… If you go for it too early, you usually miss out on something else that might be better.  You wait around too long, and you’re talking yourself into something you’ll regret later.  Again, pay attention to the specs on receiving stats for your league and get the Fitzgerald’s in Round 2-3 (depending on league depth, larger league get them sooner), Calvin Johnson’s in Round 3-4, and the Kevin Curtis’ in FA bin.

4) Talk yourself out of Brady, toward the end of the First Round and on, and talk yourself out of a league championship.

5) Handcuffing is a wasted pick

Now for my 5 draft sleepers (in descending order from most important)

• Steve Slaton
• Ted Ginn Jr.
• Ray Rice
• LeSean McCoy
• Kellen Winslow

Now for my 5 draft avoiders (in descending order from most important)

• Maurice Jones-Drew (Nothing to keep teams from loading the box, no one to share carries/abuse with = injury and lack of production
• Tony Romo (TO wasn’t the problem)
• Terrell Owens (TO is still a problem… don’t look for him to make it all 16)
• Ernest Graham (He had a good run)
• Michael Jenkins (He’s the girl hanging out by the keg at 3am… just walk home alone, friends.  Not worth it)

Draft wisely…

All Bets are on

Starting September 1st, Delaware will have a much cooler distinction besides being our 1st state (though, about even with being sales tax free), it will be the second state (but the first east of the Mississippi River) to allow sports gambling.  The First State is also going balls out with it. Initially, there was going to be bets in only two forms: “lottery” (i.e. Picking team/individual x to win a league/tournament) and “parlay” (i.e. picking a series of teams/individuals to finish in a certain order/win a series of games).

However, Governor Jack Markell (in addition to bull dogging this legislature through his own state senate) got the bill to allow single-game and situational (i.e. Kyle Orton will throw x interceptions in the first quarter… Sorry, Denver fans.  Get use to it) betting.

Game on.

Unfortunately, there are a few stumbling blocks.  Betting will only take place in the three established gaming houses that currently house the state’s slots and horse betting reservoirs (I believe that’s picturesque Dover, tropical Wilmington, and New Ark… which main noteworthy feature is that they changed the spelling [added the space] and pronunciation to avoid confusion with the less than savory New Jersey town of the same name).  The hesitance to build future casinos is probably a good idea as every sports league is fighting this decision and a Federal judge can, presumably, put the kabash on this whole thing at anytime.  Additionally, as this is the first thing of its kind to happen, taking it slow is probably a good idea.

However, I had Scarface-esque dreams of renting a beach house in Bethany and smoking cigars and sipping cheap brandy staring out at the ocean while laying down bets via the phone at the casino down the street.  I can also see Bethany becoming Atlantic City 2.0, too, in this reverie (a seedy, vice-ridden, polluted haven for the lowest denominators), which, again, is probably a good idea on Delaware’s part to limit it to three places that really have no pretense of being anything other than suckholes for companies/people priced out of Philadelphia and Baltimore.  Not really booming metropolises…

There has been talk here in Maryland about how sports betting will negatively affect our economy.  On the contrary, it may, actually, boost the financial windfall for the Old Line State.  Look at it this way…

Delaware is taking all the risk here.

If sports gambling leads to Delaware becoming a lawless place of knife fights and brothels, only Delaware’s rep takes a hit.  Not Maryland.  Delaware is also going to be solely responsible with keeping everything on the up and up… Meaning creating a whole new bureaucratic system to monitor and officiate the gambling.  More jobs, but more oversight and government involvement which, judging by the zaniness at the Georgetown Hall Meeting with the Obama birthers, isn’t something, of which, the people of Delaware are fond.

People will come and they gotta stay somewhere.

Wilmington, New Ark, and Dover are like crazy friends… Great for a “I can’t believe we just did that!” night or so, but you definitely want to keep your kids as far away from them as possible.  As people from all over the eastern part of this country flock to Delaware, they’re going to have to stay somewhere… Unfortunately for the First State, they have no major airport and have a population of about 12.  Not exactly a place that screams tourism. Fortunately, Maryland has a major airport that is about an hour’s drive from all three places (sadly, Philadelphia’s airport will probably get a bulk of the business due to the closer proximity to Wilmington and New Ark).  Maryland also has three major tourist destinations (Baltimore’s Inner Harbor/Camden Yards, Hanover’s Arundel Mills, and Annapolis) that will be great alternatives for the family man who wants to blow the kid’s college fun in Delaware.

So yeah… bring on the betting.  I think the Ravens are sitting at +9.5 to the Chiefs right now.  I think I’ll take the points…

three quick thoughts – the “everyone needs to calm down” edition

Calm Down #1

Steve McNair should be remembered as the warrior-prince he was on the field, not the alcohol-troubled adulterer he seemingly was off the field.  Not to excuse either of his sins (both of which I have been guilty, save for my extracurricular were outside of a relationship, not marriage), but what he contributed to society (not just through his tireless, indestructible Quarterback play on the field, but in his youth organizations, his community outreach [especially post-katrina in Mississippi], and mentoring numerous young people) was of immense value… We should remember the life he lived, not the way he ended it. I feel, ultimately, history will do this and he’ll be elected into the Hall of Fame (rightfully so… but that’s another blog entry)

Calm Down #2

Brock Lesnar is a Mixed Martial Artist, not the President of the United States of America. Obviously, the latter part of that statement is poking fun at Bush for his candid middle finger salute during a supposed off-screen moment following a State of the Union (Though, for all the stuff that Obama is doing better than Bush, Dubya definitely has him beat on opening pitching… Yikes, Obama.  I know you’re fixing the world right now but please work in some South Yard long toss before the World Series)… Anyway, Lesnar was riling up a crowd and generating something that his demolishing of Frank Mir didn’t do… interest.   Look, no matter how much diehards, management companies, and advertisers rave about the “athleticism” and the “skill” of these wild swinging, stall grappling fighters, you will never be taken seriously… Sorry.  The least you can do (well, most you SHOULD do) is get that money, homie… Lesnar will definitely get at least a 40% spike in pay-per-views for UFC134098214378 or whatever they’re on now… That alone should be enough for him to “climb on top of his wife”

Calm Down #3

Goddell, you proved your point… you’re in control.  This is your game.  Players had too much leeway prior to your reign.  We get it.  Uncle.  You win… Now, muzzle all these moronic, dimwitted people and let Michael Vick resume his career. Don’t give in to PETA (Which should change their slogan to:  We won all the fights so now we have to invent stuff to stay relevant… They can borrow that from Al Sharpton) or require Vick to undergo a brain scan to show that he has the capacity for empathy (unless, you know, you really want to just hand Vick back his old salary in a lawsuit that’s sure to accompany a decision to use an experimental test to dictate someone’s future).  Mr. Goddell, don’t listen to these blowhard bloggers (well, besides me) and sports talk shows… There’s too much noise in the Sports Reporting World so people get caught up saying stupider things, louder, just to be heard. Here’s all you need to look at in this case… Vick made a mistake, Vick was punished quite harshly (I don’t care if it dwells in comparison to the pups that got murked… Any argument starting/containing that is, ultimately, putting a higher premium on animal life over humans.  Of course, those dogs didn’t deserve their fate, but neither did that pedestrian that Donte Stallworth speed bumped.  Stallworth only got 30 days, Vick got 23 months… Federal.  I think Vick is the bigger loser here).  Vick lost his status/freedom/money/life! (again, some of those things deservedly so because it was a heinous act).  However, to continue to deny Vick his right to make a living would set a bad precedent and open a firestorm (Let’s just say it starts with “r” and ends with “acism” and rhymes with scracism).  No one wants that… We all want Vick to comeback.  Sign with the Buffalo Bills and lead us on a magical season running around Patriot defenders and throwing ridiculous TD passes to T.O.

Jus’ sayin’… but I’m really saying, to everyone, CALM DOWN